A Single Mom. A Second Chance.

I left the salon in Southampton that morning with perfect loose curls, excited for the day to unfold. It was a beautiful out and unseasonably warm for the beginning of October, but as soon as I felt the air after two and a half hours of glamming it up inside, the humidity hit me like a ton of bricks. My hair fell flat in seconds. One of the main reasons I chose this time of year was the general lack of humidity and smothering heat!! It was typically lovely with autumn foliage at its peak. Except for today.  It was close to 80 degrees with 90% humidity. Great. At least the sun was shining and the leaves were pretty…and the makeup that was shellacked on my face was staying put…for now.


Why did I care so much? Well, it was my wedding day! Actually, my second wedding day. A second chance, a second beginning. My hair was not cooperating so I would have to settle for drooping waves. Fine. One of the biggest things I’ve learned in the past several, tumultuous years is to roll with the punches: through marriage, infertility, miscarriages, a tough pregnancy, giving birth without pain medication, a daughter with learning disabilities, marriage break down, divorce, co-parenting, rebuilding a career, single motherhood, dating as a single mom, doing ANYTHING as a single mom, finding love again. But I’ll get to all that. First, the wedding! (the second one!)


We wanted something simple at our little home in Hampton Bays. Tucked into the Shinnecock Hills just above the Shinnecock Bay, it was a lovely setting for an intimate, daytime celebration of 20 people. I wore a soft pink, off the shoulder cocktail dress, R wore a grey suit and our little ones, (V, the flower girl and B, the ring bearer) mirrored our looks in pink and grey.


The ceremony was at noon in the backyard flanked by trees and under a floral arbor. It was HOT but beautiful. Our officiant put together a brief, touching ceremony that celebrated us as both a couple and a new, blended family.


We had an antique Chevy trunk with a wood burning pizza oven cater the lunch from our drive with delicious, artisanal pizzas and farro salad.  A small sailcloth tent housed a long farmhouse table set with subtly autumnal and rustic blooms of dusty rose, peach, soft pink, ivory and white.

I drank bubbly and basically face planted myself into the wedding cake. If you know me well, you know that cake is one of my favorite things in life. This one was one of the most delicious carrot cakes I had ever tasted with vanilla buttercream frosting.

The kids zoomed around the yard and danced to a Sonos playlist while the adults relaxed around the table, drank wine and enjoyed the afternoon.

Everything started winding down around 3pm. My parents took V for the rest of the afternoon and B was picked up by his mother, so R and I could have a few moments of peace to enjoy each other and reflect on the celebration. We sat at the table together, shared a few glasses of champagne, kissed, looked at pictures and laughed. We were so happy to be embarking on this journey together as a little, blended family. A second chance for both of us and a simple end to a simple, perfect day.


Vendor List

Photographer: Cappy Hotchkiss

Flowers: Ava Flora

Caterer: Pizza Rita Food Truck

Officiant: Brad Learmonth

Cake: Frank & Sons

Bride’s Dress: Cinq a Sept

Groom’s Suit: Richard Anderson Ltd

Flower Girl Dress: BHLDN

Ringer Bearer Suit: J. Crew


About the author: Alexis Godley

New York City Real Estate

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